Thomas and I had our first anniversary at the beginning of August, and celebrated it, as is our wont, with a minimum of fanfare.  We pretty much just let it pass, although we did go out for a lovely dinner, just the two of us.  We’re not terribly big on celebrations of this kind – anniversaries, Valentine’s Day, etc.  In fact, before we were married, neither of us could remember the exact date of our “anniversary,” nor could we determine what event that “anniversary” should celebrate.  We didn’t have an anniversary; we had a “timeframe,” if that makes sense.  It’s only now that we’re married that we (and everybody else) have a day to demarcate our years together.

So, Year the First – it has passed.  Here is my hooray! – almost a month later. I should qualify the comments in the last paragraph by saying that, in my opinion, the reason that we don’t put too much effort into celebrating each other on specific days is because we’re pretty good at letting each other know how important one is to the other on a daily basis.  Why reserve that for only a handful of days out of the year?  And here is where people will start disagreeing with me, because people ALWAYS disagree with me about this sort of thing.  They will say things like “But. BUT! You should do the daily-basis thing AND make a colossal deal about your wedding anniversary.”  And that’s okay.  You can say things like that to me.  I will ignore you, but you may say them.  Because this is our marriage, and no one else’s.  End of post.  Just kidding! –

The point of this post ACTUALLY, is to do something a little uncharacteristic for me, and talk about love on the internet. *gasp* I know.  Probably Thomas won’t let me publish this.  We’ll see.  But that’s okay too because it’s really just for him anyway, plus he already knows all this stuff.

What I wanted to say is this: When I was young(er), from the time I could conceive of myself reaching an age where marriage might be an expected eventuality, through my incredibly awkward teenage years, through dating people, and entering university, when I thought about my late twenties, my early thirties, and what I might be doing, I always, ALWAYS, pictured myself alone.  Not in a sad way, in a matter-of-fact way.  And in my very matter-of-fact way, my family and friends had it from me many times that I would not be getting married, nor would I have children (and then I turned 21 and HELLO BABY HORMONES, but that’s a completely different story and not one I’ll be sharing on the interweb any time soon, because the mention of it causes Thomas to sigh… in a long-suffering manner).  In fact, my friends still tease me about this.  The same girl who swore up and down that matrimony was not for her was the first one to tie the knot.  Hardy-har-har.

When I met and fell in love with Thomas however, my tune changed entirely.  In many things Thomas is a law unto himself, and when he was introduced into my life he reversed gravity (that was a metaphor).  Now my response to my friends’ teasing about my 180° turn on the marriage front is simple: “I didn’t think I was going to get married because I hadn’t met Thomas yet, and I couldn’t picture it with anyone else.”  (I also, of course, kick myself in the head every once in a while for all my past adamancy about marriage and babies, because really girls, you never do know, so just shut up and try to roll with the punches.  This is something I’m still working on.)

A young woman I was working with a couple of years ago asked me, while we were stuffing envelopes and shortly after Thomas and I got engaged, how I had known for sure that Thomas was IT for me.  The question was fairly out of the blue, and no one had asked me that before (everyone else, I think, knew Thomas, and didn’t have to ask), but I didn’t hesitate to answer.

“Let me put it this way,” I said to her. “In a lot of relationships people almost play a game to see if they can get the other to say ‘I love you’ first.  With Thomas, it wasn’t a game, I wasn’t waiting for him to say it, and I could barely stop myself from saying it every time I opened my mouth.” (This is literally true.  I wrote about it while I was on a bus back to Kingston one night, around the time we first got together – about how I wanted to shout it out loud in front of strangers.)

Which I guess is a long way of saying “when you know, you know,” which isn’t particularly illuminating, but both the girls I was stuffing envelopes with teared up.

There are a dozen and a half other ways I could illustrate the whys and hows and wherefores of loving Thomas, but out of respect for any diabetics in the audience let’s not overdose on sweetness shall we?

Thomas, all I need is you, too.  Happy Anniversary, my darling husband.

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  1. By Timothy on July 27, 2014 at 2:34 pm

    hilarious@redding.blanton” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    thanks for information!…

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